Life Love

The Insomniac

If you ask me what I would prefer between day and night, I choose night over day simply because the night is a time for a good rest. A time to let your eyes close for good sleep; a time for your whole being to recharge the energy after a long tiring day; a time for you to forget something that bothers you or stresses you. You forget everything; all of those are gone when the night falls—when you fall asleep for a while.

But I’ve realized I don’t like nights anymore. I hate seeing the sun sets in its nest. I hate when midnight falls. Why? Because I remember everything in the past when I try to close my eyes. I reminisce those memories of the past; I reminisce the memories of her. I overthink all of a sudden. I blame myself. Then regrets will strike me hard out of nowhere and afterward get depressed where I wish I could no longer wake up in the morning after I close my eyes. Night after night, and then it became a routine of mine when midnight falls. It became a normal scenario every night.

I am an insomniac trying to sleep and forget everything in this world. I want to forget those memories of her that keep coming back when I lay upon my bed. I want to forget her but failed every time. I want to stop these overthinking, forgive myself for blaming, and cut those ties with regrets. All I want is peace of mind when midnight falls. All I want is a good sleep when I close my eyes and a good dream. That’s all I want; that’s all every insomniac wish in this world.

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