Love Self Realizations

I’m trying…

How could you be friends with someone you once loved?
I’m sorry I couldn’t be friends with you
I’m sorry I couldn’t act like there’s nothing special between you
I’m sorry I couldn’t deny that you’re still the heartbeat of my heart
I’m sorry I couldn’t do it but here I am now trying to do so
I’m trying now…
I’m trying to look into your eyes without getting lost in them
I’m trying to be comfortable whenever you’re around
I’m trying not to be distracted whenever you’re near
I’m trying not to feel something every time you smile
I’m trying to hide the sadness within my eyes when you feel quiet at one side
I’m trying to be numb whenever I see you face to face
I’m trying to look at you and surpass all the memories we’ve shared
I’m trying not to mention that we had something wonderful, something beautiful but now is gone.
I’m trying to forget all about you
I’m trying to forget the pain I’ve caused you
I’m trying to erase all the painful thoughts inside my head
I’m trying to move on and letting you go but there are still pieces in me that hold on
I’m trying to put aside the regrets as I watch you in one corner
I know there’s nothing I could do to correct all my mistakes
There’s nothing I could do to bring back the old us
But if fate gives a chance I would try to mend the broken trust once lost
But then again maybe it’s too late for the mending
Too late for you close the door and here I am now standing outside the window waiting for nothing
Maybe too late but now I’m trying to move forward.

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