Life Love Self Realizations

Diary of a Killer

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Dear Diary,
I was innocent and harmless when I was young. I’m not fond of trouble and all I wanted was peace and harmony around me. Then came a day when my family was murdered in front of me. Seeing them bathed with their own blood pierced my heart into pieces. My world turned into desolation and I found myself isolated with everyone.

Those moments changed me a lot. Those moments changed the young boy into a monster. Those days were the darkest. My nights are filled with tears and hatred in a sudden embraced my heart slowly. I’ve made a vow to give justice for my family but justice seemed evasive as authorities still found nothing about the crime.

I was afraid of seeing blood way back when I was scared of seeing dead bodies with my very own eyes. But those memories in the past pushed me into something I never imagined. I searched and looked for the murderers of my family for many years and I’ve found them. I killed them with my very own hands. I realized I was far different from before when I enjoyed seeing their dead bodies in front of me, the hunger when they bathed with their own blood, the satisfaction of seeing a corpse scattered around the floor.

I kill for the satisfaction of my hands and soul. I kill for vengeance and justice. I have my own ways of taking justice for the victims of crimes. I have my own way of justice – – I’ll kill them with my very own hands. I’m a murderer, and yes I kill those criminals with my own way. I no longer wait for the justice of the authority because I have my own authority by killing them one by one. I hated those criminals, those murderers, those who kill without any mercy. I know I’m no longer far different from those people but I’ll kill them before they do a crime in our society. Their blood shall spill in every corner of the street for I’m waiting on them along the way.

I know killing and seeking justice with my very own hands is against the law, but I have my own law–killing is better than giving mercy for those criminals and murderers who don’t give mercy at all. Blood must be paid by blood, life must be paid by life. Forgive me if I become a murderer, all I want is justice for the victims of crime–just like me. I know there’s come a day I can no longer hide in the corner of every street. Time will come my own rules of justice will vanish like smoke. Somehow I found myself at one place that made me think peace should be written inside my heart when I met a woman who sees a good side on me. She changed my perspective and perceptions toward the world by accepting me wholeheartedly. She gave me a chance to renew myself and heal the broken wounds of my past. She was a light that shines in a sudden, a light that brought forgiveness and harmony within my soul. I guess it’s never been too late to start a new life with her.

Yours truly,
The Killer.

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